The Greatest Option to Eat a Burger Is not What You Suppose

There’s just one technique to correctly eat a hamburger and I’ll settle for the judgment of others for embracing this unpopular opinion. You must at all times use a knife and fork. I’ve been consuming hamburgers all my life. Whilst a child who was a finicky eater, a burger was one of many few meals I might at all times devour, despite the fact that as a ten yr previous, it might solely have meat and mayonnaise. Then, in my reckless youth, I’d eat it with my arms like a raccoon scarfing down a dumpster donut. I’ve since realized that utilizing silverware is way more civilized. 

Some hamburgers right this moment are so loaded with toppings they’re virtually unattainable to eat. When you add bacon, lettuce, tomato, avocado, pink onion, pickles and presumably even one other patty, it turns into a tower of tastiness that requires the unhinging of a jaw to permit it to move our lips. And we’re not even contemplating the thickness of the bun. An English muffin or ciabatta bread may make it a little bit extra cheap, however a giant, fluffy brioche roll goes so as to add a minimum of a few inches to the peak. The primary chew is inevitably a catastrophe with avocado and tomato sliding off the bun and onto the plate, presumably right into a pool of ketchup splattering onto your shirt and successfully ruining your meal. Enter the cutlery. 

There’s a technique to consuming burgers with a fork and knife. First it is advisable have a minimum of a few  toothpicks to carry all of it collectively when it’s first sliced into, in any other case it’ll topple. Barely press on the highest of the burger after which insert the toothpicks to make sure they’re going all over the layers. As soon as the toothpicks are in place, minimize the burger in half and admire your handiwork. Now you possibly can actually see what it’s important to work with. Biting right into a burger sight unseen can result in one chew that’s all tomato and no avocado after which the subsequent chew is simply lettuce. If these toppings aren’t evenly distributed, you by no means know what you’re gonna get. With silverware, each chew may be precisely what you need it to be. 

Consuming a burger this fashion additionally reduces the necessity for a number of napkins. Ketchup, mayonnaise, mustard, and general burger juices spill out in every single place once you attempt to cram into your mouth. Wiping your face after each chew, you’re going by way of paper towels such as you personal inventory in Bounty and once you’re completed consuming you want a shower. In case you’re in a restaurant, they may grace you with a moist towelette, however you’ll undoubtedly must go wash your arms after you’re executed. With a fork, your face and arms are as clear as they have been once you started.

The hamburger just isn’t the one meals historically eaten along with your arms that may profit from a fork and knife. A quesadilla, a burrito, deep dish pizza, or any pizza that has a crust that may’t assist the burden of the toppings are so a lot better when eaten with silverware. Folks could decide you or query your decisions, however don’t let it deter you. I as soon as ate a quesadilla at an Applebee’s with a knife and fork, a lot to the chagrin of those that have been with me, however I proudly adopted by way of on my non-conventional consuming fashion. The meals all leads to the identical place, so why not eat in a manner that doesn’t imply I’ve strands of melted cheese hanging from my chin? 

That is the hamburger hill I’ll die on. There is no such thing as a in-n-out out for me once I select methods to eat my burger. Consuming it with a fork and knife is a job nicely executed and I’ll smash it each single time. If there’s an Earl of Hamburg, I’m positive they’d agree with me. The following time you will have an outrageously tall burger in entrance of you, do your self a favor and take a look at it. In fact, if  it’s only a easy little cheeseburger from McDonalds, nicely, yeah, eat that one along with your arms. I’m not a monster.